Man! Dude! Session #142

(D)ude: Man! Diane Kruger carried Tarantino’s film Inglourious Basterds!

(M)an: Dude! Who do you think is going to bring down today’s Republican inglourious basterds?

D: Man! The only force that will throw out the GOP in Washington, DC is the electorate.

M: Dude! I don’t know.

D: Man! I’ve had it with your lack of conviction. I saw the White House Correspondents Association dinners from past years too all day yesterday. So what if President Clinton’s hands are bloodied by the missed opportunities to bring to justice bin Laden as Hank Crumpton’s already detailed last year to Lara Logan for CBS’s 60 Minutes! You’re just upset over the May 1, 1993 Correspondents Dinner featuring comedian Elayne Boosler.

M: Dude! President Clinton knew too much too soon to not be held equally accountable for pocketing the treasures of the Iraq and Afghanistan wars at the expense of the lives of our sons and daughters in uniform.

D: Man! You’re also upset over Hillary Rodham Clinton’s recent speaking engagement to the National Multi Housing Council who list clearly under their section Regulatory Mitigation and Reform: The apartment industry is a highly regulated sector, governed by a flood of regulations from agencies as diverse as the Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD), the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA), the Department of Energy (DOE) and even the Federal Reserve. While these regulations may be well intentioned, many will lead to costly mandates that divert resources not only from the production and operation of multifamily housing but, ultimately, also from job creation. In fact, according to research commissioned by the Small Business Administration’s Office of Advocacy, the total cost of federal regulations in 2008 topped $1.75 trillion, or $10,585 per employee for firms with fewer than 20 employees...

NMHC/NAA recognize the need for regulations but urge agencies to insist that new rules have demonstrable benefits that justify the cost of compliance. In addition, federal agencies should be aware that broad-stroke regulations often have disproportionate effects on various industries; therefore, those rules and regulations affecting commercial real estate should reflect the industry’s business and operational structure. Finally, all regulations must be grounded in fact and rely on the latest scientific and/or economic evidence.

M: Dude! The National Multi Housing Council actually stated all that in their 2013 Policy and Regulatory Issues paper that can be found under their related contents box on the right when you go to Government Affairs and the subheading 2013 NMHC/NAA Policy Agenda specifically.

D: Man! You’re not disillusioned anymore! Welcome back to reality! I really missed your presence, like Conan O’Brien’s when NBC basically tossed the checkers off the board like a broody brat in middle of a fit of physical and baseless rage.

M: Dude! We’ve never missed Conan’s show on TBS; remember the episode with Charlie Sheen fairly recently? I, like you, believe in remaining true to the game and not getting all caught up in a sourpuss phase like Chuck Lorre did with Charlie Sheen’s very public meltdown. Just read the Chuck Lorre archives from 1 to 413 and you will find the same level of crudity as Faux News’ Ed Henry at the White House Correspondents Dinner last night.

D: Man! Ed Henry’s the pervert from Fox News Channel, right? Thank goodness his term as the Association’s president expires soon. Not only does he bring out the worst in his already juvenile facial features with incessant referencing to the new mothers in the Association who needed room to address the physical and obvious demands of motherhood. In fact, I thought it very necessary for someone to interrupt Ed Henry and soothe his perverse contempt via a pacifier or a bottle.

M: Dude! Ed Henry needed his jabs nursed by Madame Rushie Limbaugh, a very obvious omission from last night’s dinner. Imagine how Rush Limbaugh would have soothed Ed Henry with those doll bottles with the artificial mobile of either milk or orange juice. Very fitting for two dunderheads with baby faces.

D: Man! Hillary Rodham Clinton was in Irving, Texas, just an hour and a half drive away from the tragic recovery efforts of West, a town comprised of the 47% who Mitt Romney and now Hillary Rodham Clinton do not include in on these exclusive speakeasies through which they amass not too shabby paychecks.

M: Dude! The residents of West, Texas deserve a place at these tables where Mitt Romney and Hillary Rodham Clinton conduct their closed-door chats. If they had only listened to the intelligence about their backyard havoc, the people of West, Texas would have proactively taken matters into their own hands and devised creative ways in which to address the stark threat of explosions and subsequent disasters. Government must regulate! Otherwise, the private sector will just continue piling their investments into these chic get-togethers and, just like Wall Street, the top earners in society will soar while the rest of US in the middle and lower classes, not to mention those amongst US who have nothing already, will suffer.

D: Man! Have you noticed how Paul Ryan’s Budget is riddled with lack of peer-reviewed research? That Reinhart and Rogoff paper from Harvard dispelled by UMass Amherst’s Thomas Herndon essentially encapsulates the GOP scheme: Fraud and intentional oversight that imperils the disenfranchised like the rest of US. No wonder Newt Gingrich and John Boehner desire to protect and expand the Heritage Foundation and the National Review!

M: Dude! Hillary Rodham Clinton is trouble for the Democratic Party. We need someone with a moral compass that is just as, if not more, compelling and transparent as President and Mrs. Obama. We need that kind of mettle that is availed by youth, those who haven’t been ensnared by the right or infidelity within.

D: Man! Skirt-chasers are becoming philosophically obsolete in the Democratic Party and the progressive mindset that is forward-oriented needs leaders that are multidimensional clean. The want for accountability is what keeps the GOP where it is today: Like the Clintons and the Bushes, the Republican Party does business underhandedly and in the shadows of democratic idealism, which too is for sale once they enter the White House.

M: Dude! If you want to truly give back to the electorate for having elected and reelected you to the White House, would you not want to build on the Library Of Congress’s continuation and furtherance? But, then again, if you were not transparent about your whereabouts during office, then you would need a presidential mausoleum!

Man! Dude! Session #141

(M)an: Dude! Ben Affleck’s going to be living on a dollar and a half a day beginning soon.

(D)ude: Man! Why?

M: Dude! I think he’s attempting to raise awareness of poverty and hunger on earth.

D: Man! Poverty and hunger on earth?

M: Dude! I’m not sure, but Warren Buffet’s son, who’s a farmer and insists that the food unfit to keep on the shelves of American grocery stores mean a net loss of about a few billion dollars worth, offers creative solutions and strategies. And, get this, it is all a matter of organization and foresight.

D: Man! Talking about billions and loopholes intentionally set in place by the GOP, did you know the George W. Bush Presidential Library ceremony was attended by Presidents Carter, Clinton, and Obama? Yeah, they gathered with the Bush Dynasty’s George H. W. and George W. on the SMU campus, the location of the library, in Dallas, Texas.

M: Dude! George W. Bush’s library is a treasure trove of false claims and blundering plundering at home and abroad. George W. Bush’s library is an overwrought mausoleum of the Bush Dynasty’s cruelties and corruptions.

D: Man! Laura Bush’s provincial referencing to “my George” over and over again was typical of an unsophisticated clodhopper yokel. Of course George W’s going to assist a soldier who lost his limbs because of George W. Cheney-Rice-Rumsfeld’s selfish war-mongering decisions that led to Iraq II and Afghanistan!

M: Dude! Again, George W. Bush’s cruelties and corruptions are entombed in that mausoleum erected on the SMU campus.

D: Man! Barbara Bush sure is an undependable source of insight. In actuality, she is just as false a herald as her son. No wonder W insisted that he had inherited his father’s eyes and his mother’s mouth! Both mother and son have that guileful tendency to vacillate between reason and feigned deficiency.

M: Dude! George W’s efforts in African continental programs of interest is just retribution for the evils he availed in the Middle East. I still believe he and his father deliberately nursed fear and terrorism, just like the current GOP Republicans are, through their refusal to join the campaign against gun violence, protecting illicit trafficking of high capacity firearms and weaponry around the world in vulnerable locales like Central and South America and, as always, at home on our own streets.

D: Man! You think the chemical weapons that Senator McCain is so concerned about in Syria have been placed there by his very own Republican Party’s political action committees? I once heard that stupidity is evil and evil is stupidity. Like a braided bread loaf, the elements of both are so enmeshed in the end that one forgets the initial toil of braiding in order to achieve such texture and flavor. I personally think that the George W. Bush Presidential mausoleum is a means of getting a tax break on all those billions the Bush Dynasty pocketed in the looting of Iraq and Afghanistan.

M: Dude! I think there comes a point in life when you surrender to the whim of tryingly jamming keys into the gates of paradise.

D: Man! That does make sense. There would be no other way to rationalize President Herbert Hoover’s constructing his presidential library after such days of Steinbeck’s Grapes of Wrath and The Winter of Our Discontent otherwise.

M: Dude! A cowboy hat had never been so out of place as atop Dick Cheney’s balding crown. If Cheney even had a strand of capacity for shame, I would say he was hiding embarrassment. He looked like he had just come from visiting Southfork Ranch where the television series Dallas was shot.

D: Man! I think George W. played a rendition of Spin The Bottle during his two terms in the White House. Dick Cheney spun around in a crying fit like that mustached man who was hired to spin on his back for Jennifer Beals’ main character in the 1983 film Flashdance. Wherever Dick Cheney landed his displeasure, just like how that mustached man refused to shave for the spinning component in the Adrian Lyne’s musical, that part of the world suffered insufferably.

M: Dude! George W. Bush read through the numbers of the living former presidents as if he were reciting a woman’s dimensions!

D: Man! What a savage! Actually, that was very inappropriate and Laura Bush’s laughter was uncalled for! George W’s reciting “42-41-39” made me wonder if those were the measurements belonging to Laura Bush or the Statue of Liberty.

M: Dude! Peggy Noonan sure did write a tough squeal for the chauvinist W. I don’t think Peggy Noonan took into consideration W’s aptitude nor aura when finishing the final draft of that speech he gave on his historic day of polls going up and down and winds going right and left. It was essentially a diatribe for war, which was only replaced with the euphemism freedom.

D: Man! George W. Bush and Omar Borkan Al Gala ought to take refuge in the replica of the George W. Bush years in the Oval Office located inside that SMU mausoleum.

M: Dude! Omar Borkan Al Gala is swooning ladies on both sides of the Atlantic over lame translations of Arabic love songs. In that sense, Omar Borkan Al Gala shares a lot in common with George W because the latter borrowed heavily from Ahmed Rashid’s book Taliban: Militant Islam, Oil, & Fundamentalism In Central Asia, which was published in 2000 and 2001.

D: Man! I remember people talking about the Taliban in the late nineties without the concern that exploded onto the scene after 9/11.

M: Dude! George W. Bush unashamedly recalled the homemade boats in Louisiana following Hurricane Katrina, without once cringing at the thought that his administration did not allocate efficient funding until it was too late.

D: Man! George W. and his entire family termed the victims of Katrina as refugees. Ugh!

M: Dude! President George W. Bush is the most characterless citizen of the world and the United States of America. I’ve heard that he takes cellular pictures of himself in the shower and bathtub and then transfers them to canvas with his own watercolors and what-have-you. I think Andy Warhol borrowed the method from Winston Churchill who invented the technique of transfer after much inventive contemplation.

D: Man! Indeed! George W. and Omar Borkan Al Gala are equivocal narcissists.

Man! Dude! Session #140

(D)ude: Man! All the living presidents are coming to Dallas tomorrow for the inexplicable opening of the George W. Bush Presidential Library, which features metal beam remnants from the 9/11 attacks on the Twin Towers.

(M)an: Dude! For Presidents Carter, Clinton, and Obama to come to Dallas to inaugurate such malaise is inexplicable.

(D)ude: Man! I went through all the books you’ve read and came across one that was utterly ludicrous but very fitting for describing the Republican lunacy at large in our nation. The plight of the people of the United States of America right now is intense as the savagery of the Boston Marathon aftermath is still fresh like the devastating wounds and all-out lives lost that Patriot’s Day.

(M)an: Dude! What book did you come across?

(D)ude: Man! Malachi Martin’s words are universal as he troves through the mess that is horror and 

evil. Although Martin describes what is now mythological like Abraham Lincoln’s wife’s constantly seeking out séances in the privacy of likeminded aching souls who too lost loved ones as she did her sons and later husband, he states clearly No horror film can begin to capture the horror of such a vision: a world without spirit. Evil Spirit is personal, and it is intelligent. It is preternatural, in the sense that it is not of this material world, but it is in this material world. And Evil Spirit as well as good advances along the lines of our daily lives. In very normal ways spirit uses and influences our daily thoughts, actions, and customs and, indeed, all the strands that make up the fabric of life in whatever time or place. Contemporary life is no exception.

(M)an: Dude! How can Presidents Carter and Obama tarnish their Nobel Peace Prizes? That’s what I do not get in their plans to attend the opening of the George W. Bush Presidential Library! Do they not know the fate of the founder of the Nobel Prize, Alfred Nobel?

(D)ude: Man! What fate of Alfred Nobel’s are you referencing? That the noble Nobel had wanted to end all war and catastrophes with the pursuit of funding and gifting endeavors that would bring the world closer together?

(M)an: Dude! I am specifically referencing to the inventor’s specialty in explosives and inventing dynamite and the tragedy that followed such an experiment: The chemistry lab explosion that killed his collaborator and younger brother and ignited the pacifist within him once again.

(D)ude: Man! Once again?

(M)an: Dude! Yes! Alfred Nobel wanted to create armaments because he believed that if he could create the ultimate weapon of savagery, the world would definitely come to the realization of the destructive forces of war and unrest.

(D)ude: Man! To create weaponries of annihilation for the sake of world peace! That’s a really profound worldview and stance for pacifism.

(M)an: Dude! It’s working in reverse with these militants and the GOP in the United States. Can you I imagine that 46 senators voted against universal background checks, even after listening to the cries of the Newtown, Connecticut parents and families who lost their chance at celebrating developmental and familial milestones?

(D)ude: Man! Veils of artificiality are inappropriate at this hour. Charting heights and anticipating tomorrows that will never come now that the United States Senate has essentially killed gun control legislation, I am devastated but my hope has been decimated with the profound shock of knowing that Presidents Carter, Clinton, and Obama will show up in Dallas for George W. Bush’s presidential library opening?

(M)an: Dude! Talk about veils of artificiality. Senator Lindsey Graham expressed the clear desire for the United States to go to war with an already provocative enemy: quote unquote radical religiousness of a specific sort.

(D)ude: Man! I know what you’re talking about! To say radical and Islam in the same sentence is absurd. Islam does not promote terrorism. And, anyways, the Prophet Mohammed actually had a scripture and prayer routine that these extremists who blatantly choose to defile Islam ought to be held accountable for knowing. I believe 99.9% of the extremists that deride Islam don’t even have a clue about the religion whatsoever. They just croon away at some colloquial Arabic lingo and jargon that has not any resemblance to Islam.

(M)an: Dude! That’s why we’ve got to vote out these Republican extremists that have disbanded from the Tea Party wagon and infiltrated the House and Senate of the United States! We must vote in the midterms!

(D)ude: Man! What’s the use of voting? The Senate Democrats also killed gun reform! And our Democratic Presidents Carter, Clinton, and Obama are going to be attending that guy’s library opening… George W. Bush is rancid.

(M)an: Dude! George W. Bush is making haste slowly! Our daughters and sons in uniform and the thousands who perished on 9/11 deserve better than this!

(D): Man! George W. Bush’s library is a oxymoron! George W. Bush is a moron!

(M)an: Dude! He is a cold-blooded killer of all those who perished in Iraq II and Afghanistan.

(D)ude: Man! I didn’t expect you to match me on the harshness towards George W. Bush’s Administration!

(M)an: Dude! I am afraid for the lives of President Obama and Vice President Biden. This year marks the fiftieth anniversary of President Kennedy’s assassination in Dallas, Texas! God have mercy! Ora pro nobis!

(D)ude: Man! John Boehner is the next in line after Biden for the presidency! President Boehner! Ugh!

(M)an: Dude! An Evil Spirit as well as good advances along the lines of our daily lives!

Man! Dude! Session #139

(M)an: Dude! Shawn Corey Carter and Beyonce Knowles are obscene capitalists.  

(D)ude: Man! Shawn Carter and Beyonce Knowles are moneymaking jackals?

M: Dude! Huh?

D: Man! Remember that children’s tale about the jackal who ran up a mountain when asked to contribute his compost? They went to Cuba to market their compost there.

M: Dude! I see your point. You’re referring to the trip to Cuba the Carters took and returned from with that Shawn Carter rap “Open Letter”… Yeah?

D: Man! The guy raps for three minutes and places expletives in lines meant to have been spoken by our forty-fourth president! That is contemptible!

M: Dude! Shawn Carter and Beyonce Knowles are too ridiculously into marketing their compost to be taken seriously. But, certainly, they are not good human beings. They are calculating and small-minded betrayers.

D: Man! They have two media empires between them, of course they are relevant to our culture and society.

M: Dude! The relevance of Shawn Carter and Beyonce Knowles is obsolete. When you gain the confidence of the President of the United States Barack Obama, you do not exploit that trust via song and dance. Carter and Knowles knowingly desecrated the presidency of Barack Obama. Both Carter and Knowles were and are behaving vulgarly, trying to make themselves come across as the president’s equals. Shawn Corey Carter and Beyonce Knowles are tasteless, popularly priced braggarts.

D: Man! President Bill Clinton and Chelsea Clinton are powerhouses as well. What about the 10.5 million dollar studio apartment Chelsea Clinton purchased in Manhattan?

M: Dude! I see your point there too. You’re referring to the $500,000 price tag that the father-daughter pair purported to have allocated to the Clinton Global Initiative University’s endeavors for 2013.

D: Man! Don’t you think that an extravagant personal lifestyle is discordant with the want to represent tomorrow’s innovators via tightfisted financing?

M: Dude! Who knows? That sectional couch or geometric rug that the powerful desire ownership over 

probably are talismans of overachievers.

D: Man! What about mobilizing the disenfranchised? What talismans are available to the sufferers of injustice?

M: Dude! You leave out a segment of existence that are the severest forms of soul afflictions.

D: Man! Sociopaths?

M: Dude! No! I was thinking along the lines of the well-to-do who cannot fathom getting together with their humbler roots.

D: Man! Reminds me of my cousins in Tennessee. They think they are Nashville like Nicole Kidman, but I think Nicole Kidman too has faded into a trashiness alongside her husband Keith Urban. You can tell by the clothes Kidman purports to wear because Urban selects what he likes.

M: Dude! Trashiness? If I were once one of the best dressed people in Hollywood as Nicole Kidman was in the pre-Urban era, I would not defer my immaculate clotheshorse senses for a crooner who doesn’t even look elegant in his own getup and garb.   

D: Man! Keith Urban is a clumsy mess of a country bumpkin madman. Imagine being married to the best dressed woman in the world and disenfranchising her of her impeccable style because of a Freudian need to possess that which is essential to her success and future as a professional actress. Keith Urban ought to write a songbook about the need to possess Nicole Kidman through dress. Possess through dress! I am in such an alcoholic stress due to my missus!

M: Dude! Reminds me of how Oprah Winfrey is wanting to refurnish one of her homes to become more accommodating to her visitors. She’s placing everything in storage. I don’t understand why she cannot get another home next door or render everything for what it is, material possession, and allow friends and family over without making such a big deal of the worth of the items they are sitting in or standing upon.

D: Man! Oprah Winfrey is stuffing storage spaces like she’s more willing to leave the items of her homes for a museum of rapacity than give anything away to her beloved friends and family. Are you capable of holding anyone endearingly in your heart if your heart is so close-fisted?    

M: Dude! I don’t get white linens and white carpets! I can sense if the person I am next to in the elevator or in five-o-clock traffic has placed such burdens upon their beds and floors.

D: Man! Me too!

M: Dude! Whatever the color of furniture in your home, white or yellow, or any range of tints between, use it without worship and give to Goodwill without deification. If you cannot keep from worship and deification, you are irrevocably bound to the words of Dante Alighieri, and sentenced to ascending and descending others’ stairs in a hellish loophole at the points of inferno and purgatory.  

D: Man! They’re really uptight and tightlipped. Too much so in this world to really harness a place for themselves in Dante’s third and last structure paradise.   

M: Dude! You make an excellent point. Shawn Carter and Beyonce Knowles are pseudo-trendsetters, like how Victoria Beckham has borrowed heavily from Balenciaga, and the questionable inclusion of Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen in Doria Santlofer’s 2012 book entitled 50 Contemporary Fashion Designers You Should Know.

D: Man! Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen ought to be banned from the world of couture altogether for their unintelligent designs. Doria Santlofer’s book probably received funding from the billionaire made-for-television flops-turned-media-moguls.

M: Dude! I think so. The quality of the pages in the book are similarly low-grade as the Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen lineup of everyday wear at Wal-Mart! Actually, Santlofer’s book loses all its stylishness with the addition of the twins as one of the ones to know in contemporary fashion design.

This Cruel World Of Existence: NRA and GOP vs. Justice For US

Mom, dear mother, listen!

The windows of my remembrances reverberate with pain

In the mid of night I awaken and weep for my lost friends

After which I cannot return to sleeping

Mom, dear mother, listen!

These floods of surging emotion

Levied nightly by the moonlight

Still our pain does not subside

Even if I attempt to sooth this sorrow

With my warm sighs

Even that engulfs us

I am just a child myself

Though I need advice

On how to console her, mother

Please tell my beloved mother

Weep, but silently

The world may overhear your pain

In this world, empty eyes consumed by desertion

Fate is bleak

Lapping the dew even from the rose of sorrow

Your heart will buffer courage

Mom, dear mother, listen!

From which magician must I acquire

The bird of peace, a dove?

Someone deign me the bird of peace

To guard these homes afflicted with anguish

And stand at every threshold like a yogi

For pain and sorrow, love is that butterfly

Which soothes oneself even on the crucifix

Love is that spring

Which bypasses desire by a million miles

Love is that castle

Where birds reside alone

Love is that courtyard

Where springtime arrives unannounced

Mom, dear mom, listen!

Please do not call out too loudly at midnight for our beloved departed souls

Maybe this cruel world of existence will deem the songs of those who died

Inauspicious!

Shiv Kumar Batalvi translated from the Punjabi by M.S. Alverston & Associates

I keep hidden one teardrop...

Life is not displeased with you.

I am just fogged by…

Oh! I am just fogged by

Your innocent inquiries.

I am flustered…

Oh! I am flustered.

Life is not displeased with you.

You have yet to sense an awareness of life

Yet you must endure these pains.

You have yet to sense an awareness of life

Yet you must endure these pains.

Smile, but bear this as well

That even simpering, you will be beholden

To the sorrows of loss.

Even while smiling, my lips feel bound!

Oh! Life is not angry with you.

I am just bewildered by…

Oh! I am just bewildered by

Your pristine inquisitions.

I am disquieted…

Oh! I am disquieted.

Life’s sorrows have entrusted us

With newfound accompaniments

Life’s sorrows have entrusted us

With newfound accompaniments:

Every cool shade we acquire

We accrued through scorching sunlight.

Oh! Life is not angry with you.

I am just bewildered by…

Oh! I am just bewildered by

Your faultless deliberations!

I am disquieted…

Oh! I am disquieted!

If these eyes are awash today

Let the teardrops pour down

Because, who knows, these eyes will

Long for this sight tomorrow!

Oh! To not know when grief dropped anchor

And when it departs…

I keep hidden one teardrop!

Gulzar translated from the Hindi by M.S. Alverston & Associates

Man! Dude! Session #138

(D)ude: Man! With the start of rationing off Head Start enrollment like a grand raffle, the GOP clearly does not want all children to defer to an educator their budding questions and theories about monsters under beds and overhead phenomena. Tragically or ironically, canines and zoo animals are oftentimes given the joys of contemplating by themselves with the pertinent habits of silence and play that the Republican Sequester is hijacking from our poor and working classers’ children.

(M)an: Dude! Play is the language of the child and educators are specifically trained to nurture in an environment of acceptance and patience that working class and poor parents cannot be left to figure out by themselves. Yeah, there is a parental instinct, but educators are irreplaceable agents in the development of a child.  

D: Man! Does the avuncular genius you converse with nowadays have much to say about how the Republican Sequestration is forcibly mandating the downsizing of such pertinent services that not only assist the poor and working classers like US, but help forge a future for the American middle class?

M: Dude! He forewarned never to consider life a game of checkers. According to him, life is the hardest continuous chess game one must conquer with personal joy and contentment based on one’s own methods of measuring triumph. Overcoming obstacles is triumph too.

D: Man! Why must religion be medicinal? Why cannot it be philosophical for children? The religious hijack spirituality from the rest of US, ordinary everyday people who love questioning and thinking about tomorrow lightheartedly.

M: Dude! I am convinced that the Republican Party is about yesterday with heavyheartedness, especially when Arianna Huffington comes on the airwaves and protests like a Tea Partier about President Obama not having a grip on the issues of the day, primarily jobs, and having put in motion The GOP Sequestration Tactic.

D: Man! Arianna Huffington’s media empire is impressive! It is consequentially affective! However, she does seem to straddle the fence between parties and really jump the wires around the time of the midterm elections to the side of the Republican Party.  

M: Dude! She is a quizzical superhero, isn’t she?

D: Man! She’s a nighthawk. Said that Hillary Rodham Clinton ought to have rested more before returning to the political scene as she has. When was the last time Arianna Huffington took a day off to become a spokesperson for restive renewal and relaxation?

M: Dude! Arianna Huffington is slick like liquid… acid!

D: Man! I think of Arianna Huffington as the mercury in thermometers. Except that at a time of great social distress by the, for example, Republican Sequestration, her veins splurge forth and bleed out the mercurial silver liquid onto the pages of the souls who dutifully take on issues affecting the disenfranchised. Imagine being a writer for the Huffington Media Empire!

M: Dude! Arianna Huffington is a duplicitous temperature gauge. She’s the kind of mercurial matter that seeps into the ground and renders the surrounds inhabitable, like the Keystone Pipeline System.

D: Man! Do you think the GOP will be turning over the trains that transport the crude oil and bitumen right now if the Keystone XL Pipeline is not hurried along? Could Arianna Huffington be harrying the Keystone XL Pipeline underground?

M: Dude! I have to babysit my nephews and nieces tonight and they love model trains and dolls and one of them is having a terrible time with a fever that just won’t go away.

D: Man! Are you afraid you will be having flashbacks to images of Arianna Huffington dressed up as a conductor doll on a choo-choo train with mercury thermometer arms?

M: Dude! Thanks for the reinforcements!

D: Man! Your welcome!

M: Dude! Have you ever noticed how parents desire stereotypical play from their children?

D: Man! Yeah! The idea of that children’s book about a doll for a boy named William comes to mind, why?

M: Dude! That’s a great example of how a grandmother overcomes the anxiety that her son and family have about their male child requesting a doll.

D: Man! What’s with this talk of orientation and the complex label of LGBTQ?

M: Dude! It’s simple: Let’s Get Beyond This Qui Vive!

D: Man! Qui Vive?

M: Dude! Long live who?

D: Man! Humanity?

M: Dude! Do you know that Adam and Eve wore conservative aprons in their days of existence in Eden? That they were given animal skins to wear when they exited and began their journey as a couple?

D: Man! Aprons?

M: Dude! Aprons are what priests in the ancient world wore all over the globe. I personally find it odd that the best theologians often overlook this piece of information.

D: Man! Or they do not care to read carefully and critically? How are we to ever discover just how much of theology is myth? Bernini’s masterworks are currently on display at the Kimball Art Museum. Do you want to go and observe the visitors?

M: Dude! You may be onto something here! People are devolving and dependent on others to define what is and is not in the world at large.

D: Man! That is a sad state of affairs, isn’t it?

M: Dude! Let’s get beyond this qui vive!

Man! Dude! Session #137

(M)an: Dude! I visited an avuncular genius and asked him what could be done with the current Republican Party members that are adamantly resisting budging while President Obama is offering to consider and adopt the chained CPI approach to lowering the deficit by over 100 billion dollars.

(D)ude: Man! My father is 65 and taking a series of medications for his mood disorder. The physician he visits every three months refuses to collaborate with the physician who set his medications originally fifteen years ago. Now my mother is seriously considering an alternative to the stubborn and uncaring psychiatrists. She recently had my father call the doctor who researched and figured out the combination of meds he is on right now. Ugh!

M: Dude! What happened?

D: Man! The psychiatrists in my father’s life are unwilling to collaborate with each other for the sake of my father’s health, which is deteriorating due to the current specialist’s hang-up about getting him to switch to inferior generics of medications that are essentially black labeled for their terrible side effects. In fact, my parents researched the generics online and found out several marks of incompetence on the part of the current specialist’s grasp of how to handle side effects. You see, one of the generics causes terrible rashes allover the body. The consumer articles online warn that if rashes surface, the medication must be discontinued. But my mother called the specialist only to be informed that the specialist was planning to treat the rashes with a steroid!

M: Dude! What are your parents going to do? Steroids are very debilitating! Physicians kept me on steroids throughout junior high school to treat my asthma. The pediatric asthma specialist that my family preferred and I adored was not available when my family had to switch to a new health insurance plan. It was devastating!

D: Man! They’re waiting for President Obama’s Affordability Care Act to roll out completely and be embraced by the Texas GOP. Governor Rick Perry, Senators Cornyn and Cruz are still trying to trample and repeal Obamacare. This gerrymandering of the districts within states has gotten out of hand- I never took either Cornyn or Cruz seriously because of their outright extremist backwardness but look how they have ascended to the United States Senate- and the sudden lull in the Republican Party has me concerned. The GOP is cooking up a storm beneath Madame Rushie Limbaugh’s gasps and groans. 

M: Dude! I believe there is a tie between law enforcement being targeted by extremist cartels and the National Rifle Association and the Republican Party. I think the latter two are financially fueling hate groups and there will be a link established in history between what is essentially a “Just Say No!” stance by GOP leaders like Governor Rick Perry and Senators Cornyn and Cruz on the war on drugs and sex education in public schools.

D: Man! I’m afraid of the “Just Say No!” stand and campaigns that embrace such a message. And I think Senator Marco Rubio’s coming out against gun control right around the time that North Korea, Syria, and Iran refused to sign on to the United Nations Global Arms Trade Treaty is intriguingly disturbing about the current Tea Partiers and the Republican Party. The GOP is fanning flames with Madame Rushie Limbaugh’s calculated groans and gasps about their demise. And the press is turning against President Obama once again with this chained CPI approach to deficit reduction he has put on the table for discussion with the severing Jack The Ripper, John Boehner!

M: Dude! Jack The Ripper? I thought Patricia Cornwell solved the case a decade ago! You know, Patricia Cornwell settled for a lot less with her literary agency. She expressed relief after being awarded 52 million dollars, but, I think she settled for one-fourth of what she should have demanded in court!

D: Man! You think Patricia Cornwell should have demanded a 200 million dollar settlement?

M: Dude! Of course! She settled for a lot less! Actually, too less!

D: Man! Jack The Ripper turned out to be financially well off and the women of the night he targeted were very much like the targets of the current GOP: the poor and working classes. Despite Roe V. Wade, gerrymandering has led to state-level saturation of neoconservative leaders who are placing women’s reproductive rights in jeopardy!

M: Dude! The Republican Party is not committed to the congressional oath to protect the welfare of the citizens on whose behalf they serve. The way gerrymandering has redistricted states, I believe there is a tyranny of the minority at the state level. Specifically, the GOP has structured states to compensate for the movement of white voters away from multicultural cities and suburbs.

D: Man! That sound byte had the same sophistication and class as Senator Dianne Feinstein of California!

M: Dude! How did you figure that out? I was paraphrasing Senator Dianne Feinstein in the congressional oath part of what I said!

D: Man! What do you think about the downsizing of Head Start due to the Republican Party’s insistence to not resolve the sequestration crisis that they are calculating as being the demise of the progressive movement forward?

M: Dude! I believe that Jack The Ripper and the basically bought conservative press fuels a culture of fearing perpetration in the hearts and minds of their audiences. This culture of perpetration is not a hoax, it is ingrained into the fabric of society. But the thing is, the reason Syria and Iran withdrew from signing the International Arms Treaty was very logistic and intriguingly understandable.

D: Man! Really? How?

M: Dude! The BBC reported what was basically overlooked on purpose by the American Press: Syrian Ambassador Bashar Jaafri revealed plainspoken concern about there not being a statement in the treaty covering the issue of there needing to be embargos in place for transferring arms to “terrorist armed groups and to non-state actors.”

D: Man! What about Iran? Did it too have a similar concern, if not the exact same point of contention?

M: Dude! According to the BBC, Iran’s UN Ambassador Mohammad Khazee considered the treaty “hugely susceptible to politicization and discrimination”… I guess that could be taken as a similar concern as Syria’s.

D: Man! I think the United States Republican Party is arming extremists and drug cartels at home with the likes of the NRA. I think the Republican Party is arming the folks Syrian Ambassador Jaafri brought up in his statement about the embargos that ought to be included in the UN Global Arms Trade Treaty.

M: Dude! “Terrorist armed groups and non-state actors” are linked with the United States Republican Party?

D: Man! The fear of perpetration is globally intense because of the United States Republican Party!

M: Dude! Did I ever disagree? I was just thinking how heroically Syrian Ambassador Bashar Jaafri clearly stated his concerns. I hope he is safe.