(D)ude: Man! Did I tell you about last Halloween at my
parents’ house?
(M)an: Dude! No?
D: Man! Well, I was at their home today and looking through photographs,
and I came across a picture of an elementary school age kid dressed as Death
with purple face paint and green hair matted into a black pointed hat.
M: Dude! Yeah?
D: Man! I inquired about the reasons for the occasion, why a
perfect stranger’s child had so enthusiastically and quite personably struck
not just a pose, but embraced our generally hesitant canine Sloane Sniff-N-Swift.
M: Dude! Sloane Sniff-N-Swift? Are you telling me that
Sherwin Sugars went by another name?
D: Man! Sherwin Sugars and Sloane Sniff-N-Swift were just
endearments! The name the vet placed on the death certificate was formal with a
sense of integrity: Sherwin Sloane.
M: Dude! A friend and
a warrior is more than what my
parents meant to state with my birth name! Why didn’t you allow me to indulge
in calling Sherwin Sugars Sloane
Sniff-N-Swift? That’s one phenomenon I missed out on forever!
D: Man! You’re not alone. I wish I could have been there
when my mother treated that one particular kid dressed up as Death with extra care
and candy! You know, she honestly mistook him as one of her Sunday school star
students, the ones who receive a medal and a gift card to one of those heavily
saturated in grease steak joints?
M: Dude! Hey! Does your mother mistake me for someone else
as well?
D: Man! You’re too complex and difficult a personality to
mistake as someone else!
M: Dude! Talking about difficult personalities, I don’t get
why David and Charles Koch and Alice Walton and her siblings and Sheldon G. Adelson
and the United States Republican Party all promote cultural avenues on
predatory praxes. It just cannot work out in the long run. You have to accept responsibility
and practice honor outside your selective and sybaritic community.
D: Man! Did you read about Alice Walton’s Crystal Bridges
Museum of American Art in Bentonville, Arkansas? There was an article in the
New York Times by Randy Kennedy that captured brilliantly the bitter taste I
get inside my mouth at the thought of having to exhibit anything, even this
morning’s cough ups and nose blows in the bathroom sink, at Alice Walton’s
Crystal Bridges Museum of American Farce.
M: Dude! Crystal Bridges? Sounds more like a national park
with caverns and hiking trails, not a fine art museum featuring exquisite canvases
and haute couture. You did leave the bathroom sink spotless, right?
D: Man! Of course! I even cleaned the shower and bathtub
with that AVON Bubble Bath solution you got in there. There were four bottles
of the stuff in the cabinet, so I took the liberty to apply liberally,
literally.
M: Dude! The Republican Party is shameless in its campaigning
and fundraising pursuits through rehashing the Benghazi, Libya tragedy and tormenting
the families of the four fallen brave and precious sons of the United States.
Paul Ryan is shamelessly insisting on parading his 2015 Budget The Path to Prosperity and the House of
Representatives has irrationally and unreasoningly agreed to and passed The Path to Prostration.
D: Man! Page 54 of The
Path to Prostration illustrates the Republican Party’s foolishness
splendidly,
Provide State Flexibility on Medicaid. One way to secure the Medicaid benefit is by
converting the federal share of Medicaid spending into an allotment that each
state could tailor to meet its needs, indexed for inflation and population
growth. Such a reform would end the misguided one-size-fits-all approach that
has tied the hands of state governments. States would no longer be shackled by
federally determined program requirements and enrollment criteria. Instead,
each state would have the freedom and flexibility to tailor a Medicaid program
that fit the needs of its unique population.
M: Dude! What about this sardonic, dull zirconium from page
55,
Repeal the Exchange Subsidies Created by the
New Health-Care Law… The new
law couples these subsidies with a mandate for individuals to purchase health
insurance and bureaucratic controls on the types of insurance that may legally be offered. Taken together,
these provisions will undermine the private insurance market, which serves as
the backbone of the current U.S. health-care system. Exchange subsidies will undermine
the competitive forces of the marketplace. Government mandates will drive out
all but the largest insurance companies. Punitive tax penalties will force
individuals to purchase coverage whether they choose or not. Further, this
budget does not condone any policy that would require entities or individuals
to finance activities or make health decisions that violate their religious
beliefs. This budget provides for the repeal of the President’s onerous
health-care law for this and many other reasons.
D: Man! What does the Republican Party want? Rick Scott is a
healthcare industry tycoon in the United States and is the Governor of Florida,
Chris Christie has ties with Sheldon Adelson to their private pharmaceutical
exports business to Israel. What’s going on? Christie’s the Governor of New
Jersey!
M: Dude! The Republican Party’s financial donors have great
hoaxes lined up for US if we choose to close our eyes to the blatant and brutal
racialist sentiments from characters like Paul Ryan and Rand Paul and all of
the 2010 influx of intellectually compromised chumps, hot pocketed by the
rightwing oligarchs.
D: Man! Is that chumps or chimps? Chumps? Okay, chumps and
oligarchs? Like David and Charles Koch, Sheldon G. Adelson, and Alice Walton
and her siblings?
M: Dude! Among many others, remember!
D: Man! What kind of tricks do these hucksters have planned?
Do Rupert Murdoch and the Koch brothers have scheduled a write up of a concrete
plan of action as to the specifics of federal financial management in the
United States?
M: Dude! Yeah, of course they do!
D: Man! What’s it involve?
M: Dude! Scratch and sniff coupons and stickers for women,
infants, and children and liquid artificial flavorings for the rest of US.
D: Man! Scratch and sniff coupons and stickers? Artificial
flavorings? Will Alice Walton be providing the rest of US store brand
alternatives to the name brand flavorings like “Adam’s” and “McCormick’s”?
M: Dude! The Wal-Mart store brand is “Equate” but I am
pretty uncertain about whether Alice Walton and her siblings carry such a brand
in artificial flavorings.
D: Man! The Republican Tea GOP wants disenfranchised women,
infant, and children to perish with scratch and sniff coupons and stickers, and
the rest of US to pass artificial flavorings.
M: Dude! More like croak than pass, on liquid artificial flavorings.
D: Man! The Republican Party is dangerous to everybody’s health!
M: Dude! The Republican Party is treacherous to everyone’s welfare!
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