Christie's curtain call stained with Tea and Koch...and Alice W. too!

(M)an: Dude! Have you noticed anything particularly peculiar about the people in attendance at the Chris Christie rallies?

(D)ude: Man! Yeah, the White female stand-ins look familiar, like they’re recycled tokens of the Republican Party from the error of 2012 that was Mitt Romney.

M: Dude! You noticed it too! And the tragedy is that those women are not even registered voters in New Jersey who try to throw off New Jersey voters by campaigning with Chris Christie.

D: Man! It’s like Sheldon Adelson provides the GOP tokens again and again, thinking folks like US cannot differentiate between our own sisters and mothers and daughters.

M: Dude! Barbara Buono is an evidence-based practitioner and will actually achieve milestones for New Jerseyans if they elect her to lead them as governor.

D: Man! Chris Christie harbors resentment towards the most vulnerable New Jerseyans, telling them to shoo if they are not of the same mindset as him.

M: Dude! You know the kind of verbal abuse Chris Christie practices with men and women with opposing viewpoints reminds me of the Cycle of Violence.

D: Man! The people of New Jersey had better refer to the domestic violence charts that are provided online in Google Search. I would refer them to domesticviolence.org, an excellent website explaining the Cycle of Violence.

M: Dude! Let’s see. Have you got a copy of the stages in the Cycle of Violence?

D: Man! Yeah. Every stage varies and the complete cycle can take up to years to move through each stage. According to domesticviolence.org, the final stages- where the perpetrator attempts to make-up and establish calm- usually disappear altogether with time.

M: Dude! Okay. So you got basically two formidable stages in this cycle. The “incident” that could be any combination of physical, sexual, and emotional abuse… Then there’s the “tension builder” when the abuser becomes angry and the structure of healthy communication falls apart with the victim feeling overwhelmed and overly cautious with an edge of self-doubt and blame.

D: Man! Chris Christie’s submissive corporate wife always wears a smile throughout what I consider psychological ordeals.  

M: Dude! Have you seen the photographs released today of Chris Christie berating a teacher on a campaign stop, pointing finger and all the anger of a truly dangerous man, while Mrs. Christie receives the woman with a “better than thou” attitude- and let’s not forget the beaming toothy smile- so characteristic of the GOP Republican Tea Partiers and their families?

D: Man! You know, I have never seen Mrs. Boehner and Mrs. Cantor ever smile, have you? I have a theory about why John Boehner and Eric Cantor’s wives never smile publically. They don’t smile because they have had a Lorraine Lonegan moment where their husbands basically brushed them off in public.   

M: Dude! The GOP wives do certainly have either a strained toothy smile or a strained indifference upon their faces. Sheldon Adelson and the Koch Brothers can spend whatever they want on their candidates like Lonegan and Christie, but I would recommend they first release all their wives from the clutches of their husbands’ contempt. Don’t the people of New Jersey care about the lives of their girls and women? Is it really too much to ask?

D: Man! Alice Munro’s The Lives of Girls and Women explored the intimate dynamics between women and men, including deinstitutionalizing girls from the second sex syndrome paralysis that gets in the way of a healthy relationship with a male significant other.

M: Dude! How so?

D: Man! Alice Munro dissects the physics of the physical and the raw emotions involved in a teenage girl’s first love affair. But the thing that American folks ought to understand is that these highly personal journeys must be respected and granted dignity via health clinics like Planned Parenthood, which do so much more than just address sexual health crises.

M: Dude! Going back to Alice Munro, I agree with the Nobel Laureate completely in her analysis of men and women. That a man can leave a room and everything tied to that place including the experiences shared, while a woman carries every nuance and moment in a room with her for the rest of her life, is so true!

D: Man! Alice Munro far more elegantly arranged that line, but I cannot say anymore because I have forgotten the title of the anthology of short stories that moment you just described came from.

M: Dude! If a man achieves such a characteristic as the one Alice Munro metaphorically describes in the woman exiting a room, that man is considered gay. 

D: Man! Why is that? Is it because of the sheer magnitude of disappointment in parents that results even to this day around an LGBT child’s identity?

M: Dude! Times are changing for the better. It does get better faster than ever. But roadblocks like Sheldon Adelson and the Koch brothers are standing in the way, care of the six men in the United States Supreme Court that have sworn their allegiance to these supremacist financiers.   

D: Man! Do they know they are supremacists?

M: Dude! The billionaires and the male justices ruling on the United States Supreme Court either put John Grisham’s thrillers to shame or a venerated place alongside US history.

D: Man! The six male justices of the United States Supreme Court would rather protect the sauce recipe for McDonald’s Big Mac than to uphold justice for all of US?

M: Dude! I thought the sauce recipe was revealed back in the nineties?

D: Man! That’s incorrect! The alternatives proposed have, thus far and by far, tasted like variations of the Thousand Island salad dressing. But I have  discovered that the secret sauce recipe is actually in the details of the salad utilized for Big Macs.

M: Dude! What details?

D: Man! McDonald’s sprinkles Romano cheese gratings heavily on the salad shred atop the beef patty of the Big Mac.

M: Dude! Would you like some Tea or Koch with your Big Mac today?

D: Man! Tea or Koch? What’s the difference?

M: Dude! I agree!

D: Man! I’ll just have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and 2% milk from Aldi, thank you. Let me repeat, A-L-D-I! I don’t want to come across anything of Alice Walton’s! Always dismissing cops after yet another DUI! Why can’t she get an automobile chauffeur?