Man! Dude! Session #211

(M)an: Dude! What’s that bandage supposed to be hiding above your left eyebrow?

(D)ude: Man! Oh, nothing. Really. It’s just a minor extraction as they say in esthetician offices when you go for a European facial.

M: Dude! I have never heard of European facials enlisting anything other than the most sterile instruments for pimple extractions.

D: Man! There you go again! Okay. Okay. I was feeling really dejected today and remembered an article I read that warned readers never to extract pimples around the cranium, especially above the eyebrows.

M: Dude! That’s the most ridiculous straight faced lie I’ve ever heard, aside from the lies the congressional Republicans are banking on in order to maintain a hold on the House and win the six or so seats they need to get back the Senate. 

D: Man! I must have compromised some great brain cells! I haven’t been able to figure out any of the four lettered crossword puzzle answers.

M: Dude! You’ve never done a crossword puzzle! The intellectual pursuits you’re mistaking crosswords with are word finds!

D: Man! Word finds! Thanks! I cannot tell you how much time I spent confused over that one conundrum since the self-inflicted extraction of the pimple above my eyebrow!

M: Dude! The conundrum the Republican GOP has placed the United States in is unsustainable. Their proposals for congressional resolutions are all counterproductive and actually undemocratic. ABC News health correspondents are now broadcasting stories of how the Republican Party membership wants people to ditch Obamacare for care abroad in places like Central and South America. The only drawbacks they report are high rates of infections and consequent deaths.

D: Man! John Boehner and Chris Christie ought to be expected in Argentina soon for some new joints and Mitt Romney is seriously reconsidering transferring his healthcare to that tax haven somewhere in the Caribbean. And Reince Preibus and Sarah Palin are receiving ineffectual drug and alcohol treatment in Dubai, therefore, they have decided to have facelifts in order to hide the dire effects of substance abuse in nearby UAE.   

M: Dude! Please! Get it together! You’re being very unruly as of late. Even worse than Tom Hiddleston’s Hal in Henry IV!

D: Man! The Hollowed Crown! I was simply blown away by the dynamics between Hal and Falstaff. That’s the one, isn’t it, where Simon Russell Beale plays Falstaff to the punch? Oh! That was one fantastic ride that Falstaff played by Beale opposite Tom Hiddleston’s Hal!

M: Dude! They did execute their roles with a gentle and original motional as well as emotional intensity! Jeremy Irons, however, presented the traditional and stiff Shakespearean zest. I would hate to see an end to this natural progression generation to generations of more and more naturalness and relatable style of performance if David Cameron has his way and he and the Tories, like the Republicans and John Boehner, do away with the hard work of the Labour Party in England and the Democratic Party in the United States, like cutting government benefits as Cameron purposes for 16 to 25 years olds, and dismantling Obamacare as the Congressional Republicans are demanding.      

D: Man! Prime Minister David Cameron and House Speaker John Boehner want the 16 to 25 year old whippersnappers to become enrolled in school, employment, or training opportunities that will allow these lazy good-for-nothings to become small business owners and/or major corporate sharks theoretically, right?  

M: Dude! Yeah, but I think Prime Minister Cameron and House Speaker Boehner are playing card games with youth, and that is a dangerous concoction indeed! All they will be able to do is bet that a fraction, if only one, of the hobos they want to either educate, employ, or train rather than allowing them government benefits, will succeed to a position of corporate power that they can then make into their respective parties’ poster child that Eric Cantor can blasphemously advertise on the campaign trail as an epitome of conservatism.  

D: Man! The midterms are upon US! Are you and I hobos?

M: Dude! We are living on the edge, which could even be said to be the wayside of society, but we are employed in so-so jobs that, personally, I do not particularly find intellectually stimulating. A guy came in the hardware store today and was definitely checking me out as a plausible hobo, or a potential churchgoer for whatever congregation he was so enthusiastically dramatizing as a safe haven for lost souls such as we.

D: Man! I would like to go off to Divinity School and open my own church. I would also appreciate an opportunity to specialize in Anthropology and go and upkeep the Acropolis of Athens or the Pyramid of the Sun in Teotihuacan.  

M: Dude! There is a danger in implementing the Tory and the Republican mindsets into policy. It produces the suffering, wrath, and eventual ambiguity in the human soul that cannot create anything other than stiff and white collared starched interpretations of Shakespeare’s anthology while the honest scholar for whom the sacrifice was made by the schemers that are the Tories and the Republicans goes neglected. That is what leads to leaders like George W. Bush and Joseph Stalin.

D: Man! Raskolnikov!

M: Dude! Exactly! Scholars with no means to survive!

D: Man! I came across a series of books about the civil rights movement and one was a biography of Supreme Court Justice Thurgood Marshall by an African-American law professor from Baltimore, Maryland named Larry S. Gibson, who shredded Marshall’s significance and intellectualism while managing to get Marshall’s surviving family members to endorse his insensitive and harsh book.

M: Dude! Larry S. Gibson wrote the book probably when Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan self-forecasted themselves to become the winners of the 2012 election. Essentially, you just happened to pick a 2012 release that had not fully acknowledged reality, the true beautiful soul of the United States of America that had chosen to popularly reelect the soul that continues to work with a team of like-minded brilliance.

D: Man! As Thomas Jefferson said to Edmund Pendleton, The fantastical idea of virtue and the public good being a sufficient security to the state against the commission of crimes, which you say you have heard insisted on by some, I assure you was never mine.

M: Dude! That was a rather great performance you did right then! But I think you ought to stick to your day job and those far more appropriate daydreams you shared with me earlier.