Man! Dude! Session #183

(M)an: Dude! Your nieces were the utmost sophisticates yesterday at that barbeque.

(D)ude: Man! Really? What about them convinced you they were worthy to be held that high socially?

M: Dude! I was sitting here reading the latest issue of Architectural Digest and they came by and sat down diagonally from me. They reassured me that I could buy whatever gift I wanted to for them and that the real highlight of any gifting occasion was my presence.

D: Man! Did you gift them anything beforehand?

M: Dude! Yes.

D: Man! How many hours prior to their beneficent entreaty?

M: Dude! They’re only seven and six-years-old! And, by the way, it mustn’t have been but four hours since my gifting them the latest Barbie.

D: Man! What exact words did they choose to convey their appeal?

M: Dude! You can gift us whatever present you like. Any gift would be thoughtful and it’s your attendance at the party that will have mattered most. You know, our cousins rarely accept the invites to play and celebrate with us on special occasions.

D: Man! You should have responded in kind!

M: Dude! I did! Your thoughtful regards and honest-to-goodness sincerity are much appreciated. I will take into account your generosity and goodwill when making my next trip to the mall on your behalf.

D: Man! That’s rather stiff upper lipped! Did they have smocking on their dresses that matched the kerchief in your vest pocket?

M: Dude! Of course! And of course!

D: Man! Maybe the advanced level sensibilities of kids these days will help in the overall protection of 

democratic principles. I don’t get it. The Republican Party is confiscating and sequestrating and no one is calling them out for the actions they are taking. It’s like white supremacists running amok at the state and local levels of government. It’s dangerous on so many levels.

M: Dude! The Republican Party is the twenty-first century version of totalitarianism. They are suppressing the votes of the constituency through the guise of strict voter identification requirements. I don’t understand how the United States GOP can talk about interventions in the Middle East and elsewhere when they are instituting such oppressive measures on the homeland.

D: Man! Stalin and Lenin were revered, much like how the conservative constituency is blinded by the Faux News mentalities that make money off of their white supremacist idealism. Those who benefitted the most since the Citizens United decree, clearly bought the Supreme Court justices who killed one of the most significant parts of the Voting Rights Act of 1965.

M: Dude! Sitting Supreme Court Justices Scalia and Thomas have actually attended events like the one held by the Koch brothers in Albuquerque, New Mexico about two weekends ago that is still cloaked in secrecy much the same way Stalin and Lenin ruthlessly oversaw the deaths of countless at the height of their totalitarian regimes.  

D: Man! Who is who in the Republican Party? Didn’t Nazi Germany invade the Soviet Union in 1941 after Hitler and Stalin agreed to a pact in 1939 that divvied Eastern Europe between them?

M: Dude! That’s the reason why democracy in the hands of a diversifying constituency needs to be defended and held sacred. You think the people staging protest on behalf of Morsi or Assad are doing so of their own volition?

D: Man! No?

M: Dude! Exactly! Morsi and Assad are giving their defenders compensation of multiple sorts in order to cling onto their oppressive ideals. Like the Koch brothers, Morsi and Assad are intent on deregulating government and cutting all the safety nets for the disenfranchised. This leads to chaos, which is the perfect social state for people like the Koch Brothers. The more chaos, the hotter their pockets get.

D: Man! You mean that the Republican Party actually pays people to attend their rallies and demonstrations?

M: Dude! Yes! If Arianna Huffington can load a bus to attend a rally as she did not too long ago, imagine what kinds of bus and plane rides the billionaires of the Republican Party can promise in return for organized protest.

D: Man! That’s where the Karl Rove PAC money goes? To fund the image of protest and far-right concerns in a selected group of hecklers?

M: Dude! The Koch brothers have been studiously pursuing what is essentially dirty politics and even dirtier money channeling from the likes of dictatorial regimes abroad.

D: Man! Who’s on the other side?

M: Dude! The George H.W. and George W. Bush presidencies laid the foundation for big time cheating and charades. The Bush Dynasty intermingled with the likes of foreign oil and fraudulent oversea contractors who were hired because they promised much more than they could afford or were willing to put in the time to accomplish so everybody in the pact could pocket major dollars.

D: Man! And Senators Lindsey Graham and John McCain are still wanting to reinvestigate Benghazi, Libya?

M: Dude! They are in on the hoax as well. The Republican Party of the United States is in deep waters but refuses to take their training fins off and try to swim separately from special interests and lobbyists. Folks like Paul Ryan and Eric Cantor made a deal with head honchos like the Koch brothers and the tax-evading weasel-ferret Norquist.

D: Man! Other than their ties to the head honchos, they are pretty weak candidates for public office. Their talking points are incongruous and their mathematics still consists of manipulating an abacus. So what kind of Barbie is trending nowadays?

M: Dude! There’s the Mars Explorer Barbie equipped with pink oxygen tank and space boots. It was launched after collaborative design tips from NASA’s Extravehicular Suit Team. There is a six-wheeled science laboratory that is available for purchase. I did not feel like taking the time to buy and then play make believe with the girls. I’m feeling really tired out by the summer scorch. I am counting down to the fall.

D: Man! You know it’s a six-minute descent through the Martian atmosphere that the astronauts have to endure second-by-second?

M: Dude! That’s really something! But did you hear about the magenta planet that was discovered over the weekend? It’s actually too far away right now, but its name is GJ 504b and it is four times the weight of Jupiter.

D: Man! A huge hot pink planet just in time for Mars Explorer Barbie!