Man! Dude! Session #247

(M)an: Dude! What’s the matter? It’s Christmas Eve! What are these envelops doing all lined across the table over there anyways? You only had until yesterday to post Christmas cards! How was your parents’ annual dinner party?

(D)ude: Man! The annual dinner party was a smash! Everybody liked my gift idea. We all handed unmarked envelops to Uncle Paul containing whatever cents and dollar bills we could afford to gift to the UNICEF K.I.N.D. Fund.

M: Dude! It’s an awesome collaboration between UNICEF’s United States Fund and MSNBC’s “The Last Word with Lawrence O’Donnell” that provides classroom desks to Malawian primary schools that serve upwards of 3,000 students in what the UNICEF website states as multiple shifts.

D: Man! I think the first 100 desks were delivered in February 2011 and the goal was to reach 46,000 desks to be delivered across Malawi to Kids In Need of Desks. But not only did the K.I.N.D. Fund raise enough to meet that first marker, it has built a factory in Malawi where desks are manufactured by local workers trained by the original foreign manufacturers of these desks.

M: Dude! Edward Snowden is addressing the people of England after the Queen’s speech tomorrow. The backwoodsman doesn’t particularly like being under the watchful eyes of President Putin in Russia. But I sincerely believe Edward Snowden ought to be subjected to Siberia’s chill and the teachings of Tom Cruise’s personal wing of Scientology.

D: Man! Subject Edward Snowden to watching Tom Cruise’s Mission Impossible 4: Ghost Protocol over and over again while in Siberia. The dust storms of Dubai depicted in that film will keep him cozy at all times.        

M: Dude! Edward Snowden is really obsessed with Tom Cruise’s characters. At this stage in his life, I consider Snowden is dancing around in his knickers while concocting cocktails and rehearsing the scripts of all the rightwing moves that his idol Dick Cheney gives on a day-by-day basis. 

D: Man! Edward Snowden is being showered with accolades from the rightwing. Edward Snowden-like right-wingers are the engineers of terrorist attacks like 9/11/01. The rightwing conservatives in England are the Tories and David Cameron is favoring with the Tories’ rationales for quite some time now. The face of terrorism in the world right now is Edward Snowden. He is the mouthpiece for the GOP Republicans in the United States.  

M: Dude! I agree that the rightwing and the GOP Republicans in the United States are trying to recreate 9/11/01 somewhere in the United States. But I think the Tories in England and David Cameron are polluting the European Union and making the EU embrace and spread racialist sentiments for the disenfranchised that Rupert Murdoch was so instrumental with orchestrating through his media empire in England and the United States.

D: Man! The Syrian Refugee Crisis is really hurting the economies of host nations like Lebanon, Jordan. Turkey, Iraq, Egypt, and Israel. And to make matters even more severe for these host nations, the Tories in England and the GOP Republicans in the United States have been legislating through unnecessary crises like the Government Shutdown in the USA which wasted at least $24 billion dollars, fractions of which organizations like Amnesty International is trying to secure for the nations providing shelter and services to Syrian refugees, 52% of these refugees being children.

M: Dude! There is a genocidal disregard in the air, isn’t there? And the Tories and the GOP Republicans are behaving really badly and need to be ousted from office, for the sake of the entire world. Vince Cable is not a rambling fool in English politics. He is the only brave soul that has gathered the courage to decry David Cameron as the Enoch Powell of the moment, Enoch Powell being the man who spread immigration panics across England and racist propaganda much the same way as Representative from Virginia Eric Cantor decries the diplomacy efforts of the Obama Administration and the implementation of the Affordable Care Act by sharing supposed true stories from his constituents about how charity is the way of the future, dismissing the fact that there has been no trickling down of wealth via Trickle Down Economics in the United States or elsewhere.

D: Man! Did you hear Faux News’ Ed Henry stating to President Obama about “God forbid, there be another 9/11” during the 2 hour and 15 minute press conference at the White House just before Christmas recess? 

M: Dude! The GOP Republicans cannot keep their strategies from coming out into the open. And they resent their own intellectual impotence, especially Representative Darrell Issa of California. And the same can be said of Faux News’ Ed Henry. The former releases all government documents to CNN and the latter consistently badgered the President about the glitches and the post-glitches of the Affordable Care Act and how Ed Henry from Faux News believed there were lies involved somewhere.  

D: Man! Talking about Enoch Powell, have you heard how the Koch Brothers have purchased the hiring rights for all appointments at Florida State University in Tallahassee for the meager sum of $1.5 million dollars?

M: Dude! The Koch Brothers are now targeting public higher education? That’s a very treacherous way in which to infiltrate the minds of generations to come, like how millennials are being targeted by subpar programming on television such as the Pivot and Fusion channels. I saw Senator John McCain’s daughter disrespecting herself on the Pivot channel, while Jorge Ramos is promoting an English-only dialogue in the United States on the Fusion Channel. And then there are the obscenities of channels that too are linked to ABC and Disney, such as History and A&E that are promoting back the misogynist Phil Robertson and his clan of lewd sons and disrespected wives.

D: Man! These channels and their degradation of the United States of America are deplorable. The only way to get back from the GOP Republican brinkmanship is to secure two valid forms of identification and vote in 2014’s Midterm Elections in the United States! One world, one chance, your vote, the 2014 Midterms Elections in the United States!