Man! Dude! Session #224 "It was an omission that was inadvertent."

(D)ude: Man! The Republican Brand is very much intact, despite all the news indicating otherwise. At the state level of governance all is quiet on the right wing front. The Tea Party is still a part of the Republican GOP too. Look at how the Republican GOP Tea Partiers are holding onto their agendas as governors in states like Wisconsin, New Mexico, Ohio, and New Jersey to mention four.

(M)an: Dude! Ed Gillespie, chairman of the Republican State Leadership Committee, went too far in his assessment of the right wing righteousness of Ohio Gov. Kasich and New Jersey Gov. Christie and United States Rep. Paul Ryan as being genuinely concerned about helping and assisting those who have not. But, then again, what can you expect from an ex-counselor of George W. Cheney?

D: Man! Did he go on to corroborate the latest Dick Cheney has imparted to 60 Minutes? Apparently, Cheney remembered having the same issue arise in his medical care as one of the characters in a recent episode of Homeland.

M: Dude! What? Did Dick Cheney also have his implanted cardiac defibrillator, or ICD for short, hacked by terrorists as well?

D: Man! Almost, and like all the occurrences in the W.-Cheney White House, we will never quite be able to understand the evil and the paranoia that George W., Dick Cheney, Donald Rumsfeld, and Condoleezza Rice programmed into their circadian cycles in order to come across as convincing warlords.

M: Dude! That sounds like a potential future episode of either Homeland on HBO or the return of Sigourney Weaver in another installment of Aliens or Avatar.

D: Man! Avatar didn’t deserve the Oscar that Weaver thought it merited. And Aliens Resurrection was enough! You know, I think the same can be said of the George W. Cheney two-term cheats.

M: Dude! Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi of Italy is in a kind of similar trouble as Texas Republican Senator Ted Cruz. The Italian broadcasting media billionaire was convicted of tax fraud but if he doesn’t lose his seat in parliament then he will remain immune from arrest. Likewise, Ted Cruz apparently has been having problems with reporting his financial relationship with a company he cofounded with a college roommate from Princeton and Harvard.

D: Man! Does Ted Cruz have any idea of his involvement in the election and reelection of George W. Bush? Has he forgotten that his wife served in W’s Treasury Department circa 2003?

M: Dude! You know, he’s so intellectually challenged from having to keep up with his complex rubric of lies that he runs around in pursuit of everything green. I think he is so ensconced in telling untruths that his wife left him for Goldman Sachs.

D: Man! Really?

M: Dude! His wife is now an executive at Goldman Sachs. But they remain married.

D: Man! If I were married to Ted Cruz, I would have become a workaholic executive myself. Imagine having to come home to a pathological liar. I am a habitual liar myself, but to advance onto a pathology of deceit and distrust is just too much! Is there anywhere I can go online or at the library to get a complete transcript of what Ted Cruz said during that 22 hour effort to lay some green eggs?

M: Dude! I don’t know. I think he misused Dr. Seuss. Ted Cruz is abusive. But so is Sheldon Adelson.  

D: Man! What about Sheldon Adelson has you bringing him up in the same breath as Ted Cruz?

M: Dude! Ted Cruz and his roommate from Princeton and Harvard, David Paton, had $100 million worth of investments in a firm misnamed deliberately by Cruz in his papers to the Ethics Committee of the United States Senate to avoid, I believe, being kicked out of office. You see, in a October 1, 2013, according to Time’s Massimo Calabresi and Alex Altman, Cruz misinformed the Ethics Committee for the second time by misdirecting their attention to a company name that was not registered in Kingston, Jamaica as he had claimed.

D: Man! What about the first time he tried to cheat the Ethics Committee?

M: Dude! Ted Cruz has a bellowing belly and the capacity to sail ships with the hot air that exits his mouth at the speed of sound.

D: Man! Ted Cruz sails ships from the rear. That’s why his eyebrows are strained to the sides of his face as babies in their nappies do.

M: Dude! Like Sheldon Adelson, the Cruz and Paton private equity firm Caribbean Equity Partners Limited has a six million dollar stake in the Atlantis Resort and Casino brand of vacation destinations.

D: Man! That’s Paradise Island in the Bahamas! Atlantis? Yeah! Could only be the one and only one! Right? Osh gosh! Talking about Sheldon Adelson, New Jersey Governor Chris Christie administers gag orders upon himself as a rule of governance. And he has a favorite spokesperson that dodges and directs questions that are too tough for even Chris Christie to face. Have you heard of Michael Drewniak?

M: Dude! No. Is he the spokesperson that Christie has employed?

D: Man! Yeah! Apparently, Governor Christie’s Admin decided to go with the East Rutherford firm MWW for an additional $2.2 million because the cheaper but equally reputable firm, Sigma Group, did not include Christie and his family in its campaign to promote New Jersey and the surrounding areas devastated by Superstorm Sandy last year.

M: Dude! What about the 2014 and 2015 seasons? Are they going to cost just as much, or is this investment in the post-Sandy tourism campaign suddenly an antic of the Republican and Sheldon Adelson candidate Chris Christie?

D: Man! There’s a state contract that now stipulates things like the future of the remainder of that $25 million.

M: Dude! Allotted for tourism campaigns in New Jersey by the federal government via disaster aid following Superstorm Sandy, but now subjected to a state contract? Sounds to me like Chris Christie couldn’t care any less for New Jersey and is basically maneuvering everything behind closed doors.

D: Man! New Jersey and Israel have an imports exchange that brings New Jersey over $10 billion in revenue. Why must Chris Christie go after unions and workers and their pensions and rights in order to balance the state’s budget? How about going after those businesses that are bringing in $10 billion from trade with Israel?

M: Dude! Their baloney has a first name and it’s C-O-R-R-U-P-T-I-O-N.

D: Man! Their baloney has a last name and it’s P-O-W-E-R.